My adventure in becoming a [Good] Mormon

That is now my official term to describe emotional exhaustion.

I feel like crap. I’m irritable and grouchy and most people are annoying me(with the regular few exceptions  of those who never annoy me). I am completely worn out and ready to toss the towel in (that is the correct analogy for surrender right?). And it really sucks 1)comparing yourself to others then feeling completely inferior and just plain squashed (I know I shouldn’t do that, but lately it seems impossible to avoid) and 2)feeling, because of some actions, you’re failing at what your duties are.

I am out of ammo now and I have no clue what other options I have without causing mass drama in the only place there is little to no drama in my life…That, however, seems to be changing. I reeeeally don’t want Church to end up with any amount of drama in it, that’ll kill me.But I don’t know what to do…And I know, people can make their own choices…But it’s killing me to see them headed where I came from or even further off into the distance. And because I can’t seem to turn them around, I feel like I’m seriously failing at what I’ve been tasked with doing.

In fact, a few of my friends have recently started the slow coming about of my death…If they keep this up I’m gonna have 60 year old wrinkles at 30 and I’ll be dead by 45 from stress >.>…

And on top of that all, as I always get in winter, I am insanely hungry all the time. It’s driving me bonkers. Not that I ever gain any weight though, which is nice, but it’s an annoying feeling.

And I’ve degenerated to listening to something close to rap.

I know, I know, I know; ‘Cass, go pray about it’…But I like to rant here first, do homework then pray about it.


Comments on: "*flaumpflaumpflaump*" (1)

  1. Cass: You can’t change people, and that is not your responsibility in any case. Your responsibility is to live your life as best you see it, to be an example, and to have a ready answer when people finally feel as though they want what you have. We all want to do much more … but people are people and everyone is in a different place when it comes to their awareness / desire to know God — or to even live life in a ‘good’ way. Biblically, it is clear that only the Spirit of God can effect change in people — that same Spirit makes lives miserable by convicting people of sin — especially when the person involved doesn’t want to be reminded of God’s standards.

    This part of life remains constant — as you know, I am not Mormon, and would hope that some day you would understand where I am coming from in that respect … but it is not my place to convince you otherwise — only to be here if you have questions and want to explore that. God deals with us all based on the degree to which He has revealed Himself to us.

    The fact of the matter is that the majority of your pre-Mormon period friends will eventually fall away — because their standards are different, and they will always see your higher standard as an accusation as the Sprit works in their lives. That’s a consequenceof trying to live for God in a godless world. You will gain new friends who connect at a much deeper level … be patient … be faithful … God has His plans for you, and anything He has for you will certainly exceed your own visions and dreams.

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